Which of Jess's friends are you?

What's your favorite song by Taylor Swift, a 28-year-old literary goddess?

"Shake It Off," because it's a 2-4 year old song about how bakers bake.

"You Belong With Me," because I, too, played clarinet in a marching band.

"Blank Space," because it mentions Starbucks, a corporate conglomerate often discussed in economics textbooks. Also because I love covfefe.

She's overrated.

"Look What You Made Me Do," because of its essential place it took in the pantheon of the arts the moment it was released. The song is a culmination of Swift's career and time in the media, reclaiming the image that the press and pop culture commentators bestowed upon her over the years, from her ingenue days to "playing the victim" to the "snake" role she was unwittingly cast in her previous feud with Kanye West and Kim Kardashian West. It was a unique work of great artistic merit, given that it could not have developed without years of media obsession with Taylor Swift and her overall growth in the spotlight. The line "Sorry, Old Taylor can't come to the phone right now -- Why? Oh, because she's dead!" seals the thesis of the composition, portraying a woman leaving her past behind and rising from the ashes as a phoenix would. The music video was similarly packed with meaning: a tombstone featuring her songwriting pseudonym, representing the end of subtlety and hiding; the one-dollar bill in the bathtub representative of her countersuit against DJ David Mueller, who sued her for defamation following her accusations that he groped her inappropriately; the streaming company she breaks into references her fraught relationship with Apple Music; the cat shirt she sports speaks to her media image as a "crazy" cat lady; back-up dancers wearing I <3 T.S. Shirts harken back to paparazzi images of former beau Tom Hiddleston wearing a similar shirt; the T-shirt that the "You Belong With Me" Swift wears has the handwritten names of friends who have stayed by her side; the high-ponytail Taylor with a Grammy is a shot at nemesis Katy Perry, who has not won a Grammy; the Godzilla that appears halfway through the video hints at Taylor's upcoming persona of a Japanese monster rising out of the sea to destroy buildings; there are several cameos by theremin wunderkind Louisa Ray, a call to action for her fans to support more spooky stuff; in a blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment, Swift's father appears in his actual capacity as an accountant to do taxes, in what can only be interpreted as a commercial for his CPA business; a line from "Look at Me, I'm Sandy Dee" can be heard in the background when Swift dons her Pink Ladies jacket; parts of a murder investigation are seen scattered throughout the video based on the death of Teresa Hallbach, the investigation of which was featured in the Netflix documentary Making a Murderer; at the end, it turns out the music video took place in the imagination of an autistic boy. This is why Taylor Swift is the greatest songstress of all time.

"Gorgeous," because it opens with the child of Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively, and I wish I were the child of Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively.

Which of Jess's friends are you?

Which of Jess's Friends Are You?

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