Which One Of My Garbage Sons Are You: Batman Edition

A humorous comic-style image featuring Batman looking frustrated in front of a chaotic scene with his four sons: Dick, Jason, Tim, and Damian causing playful mischief around the Batmobile.

Which Garbage Son Are You? Batman Edition

Welcome to the ultimate quiz that examines the chaotic world of Batman's "garbage sons." Dive into the absurd and hilarious antics of Dick, Jason, Tim, and Damian as we explore just how toxic you truly are!

Answer quirky multiple-choice questions
Find out which of Batman's dysfunctional sons you embody
Share your results with friends for some laughs!

6 Questions2 MinutesCreated by DramaticBat455

I’ve got some shit boys. My huge beautiful Gotham gave me children who think and speak like the toilet. I have four garbage sons: The first son is named Dick, the second son is named Jason, the third son is named Tim, and the fourth son is the dreaded Damian. Which one of my toxic sons are you? Take this quiz to find out!

Which one of these garbage things have you done?

Spray-painted the word “JOKER” on the side of your nice dad’s wonderful car so that the Justice League had to come and blow up the beautiful car, which is the Batmobile

Opened up the trunk of your nice dad’s wonderful Batmobile and shouted the word “Fuck!” into it so many times that the resale value of the car went down by half

Invited your nice dad to Career Day at your school, where you told your classmates that his job was “trying to bring the Joker back to life” and that he did that job for free because he was “in it for the love of the game,” even though your nice dad’s real job is “billionaire CEO”

Packed hundreds of bones inside of a humpback whale’s blowhole so that when the whale came up for air, it shot an enormous fountain of assorted bones into the sky like nightmare confetti and frightened the passengers of a nearby dads cruise

What did you get your nice dad for his worst, most recent birthday?

A T-shirt with your nice dad’s face on the front and the words “Batmobile Owners Die Angry” on the back

A bird skeleton that you stole from a museum that got your nice dad sent to Arkham Asylum for two years after police found it mounted above his marital bed

Thousands of subscriptions to The Gotham Gazette, so that on delivery day a huge truck pulled up and dumped so many copies of the same magazine on top of your nice dad that he remained trapped under the pile for three days before rescue workers finally found him

Hired an extremely convincing look-alike of your nice dad’s hero, Superman, to come to your house and give your nice dad the middle finger, thereby causing your dad to wail and weep long into the night

My garbage sons love to steal my credit card and buy bad things. What do you buy when you steal your nice dad’s credit card?

An oil painting depicting Batman stuffing your nice dad’s entire body into the tiny exhaust pipe of his beautiful Batmobile ($1,800)

A gravestone with your nice dad’s name on it and an actual astronaut in a full spacesuit to throw that gravestone through the windshield of your nice dad’s Batmobile ($800 for gravestone, $1,600 for actual astronaut)

You hire the real Superman to come to your house and give your nice dad the middle finger, thus causing him to wail and weep continuously even to this day ($750)

A series of billboards running up and down our nation’s highways sporting a picture of your nice dad’s face with the words “Here Is The Man With The Tiny Hands” written beneath it ($25,000 per month)

My gutter sons have sewer mouths that belch out true terrors. The words they say make me wish the world had exploded before I was born. Which of these toxic things do you say the most?

Sentences involving the phrase “a big and illegal shipment of bones”

Sentences involving the phrase “luring my garbage dad into the carnival prison”

Sentences involving the phrase “graves for fathers”

Sentences involving the phrase “Batmobile demolition”

One time, all my garbage sons got together to build an enormous marble statue of me weeping in the front seat of my wonderful car. The base of the statue had the inscription “I Am The Night.” My gutter boys built the statue right in front of the town hall where everyone in the town could see it. Now, all the children in the neighborhood laugh at me and call me “The Cry Person.” Have you done this to me?

Yes

Absolutely

Yes, I loved doing this to you with all of my dumpster soul

It was the greatest thing I’ve ever done in all of my garbage life

Which One Of My Garbage Sons Are You: Batman Edition

Which Garbage Son Are You? Batman Edition

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