Citat

I could stand in the middle of 5th Avenue and shoot somebody and I wouldn't lose voters.

A lady came up to me one day and said 'Sir! You are drunk,' to which I replied 'I am drunk today madam, and tomorrow I shall be sober but you will still be ugly

I like a drink as much as the next man. Unless the next man is Mel Gibson.

If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman.

I think of a pessimist as someone who is waiting for it to rain, I am already soaked

Norge är den sista sovjetstaten

You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time.

Då sa jag till domaren på ren svenska: Go home

Jag kan ingen italienska alls, jag vet inte ens vad spaghetti heter på italienska

I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.