Are You Smexy Enough to Join Shrek's Cult

A whimsical and colorful illustration featuring Shrek surrounded by quirky characters with various hairstyles, beans, and onions, in a vibrant swamp setting.

Join the Shrek Cult!

Think you have what it takes to be part of the most exclusive cult on the internet? Take the quiz "Are You Smexy Enough to Join Shrek's Cult" and discover your true connection to Shrek!

  • 10 hilarious questions
  • Find out your Shrek spirit animal
  • Uncover your inner onion-loving self
10 Questions2 MinutesCreated by LaughingOnion57
What color is your hair
Blonde bc I AM SO HOT AND FETCH
Brunette
Ginger (I have no soul)
Black like my soul XD
Dyed
GrEeN moist beans
Other
What is your favorite type of bean?
Ew beans are gross, I'd rather have Starbucks lolol
I LOVE ALL BEANS!! BEAN EQUALITY!
Kidney beans because it reminds me of eyeless jack from creepy pasta XD x3
I don't know... Beans aren't really my favorite.. I'd rather just have pizza or something...
Which answer choice describes you the best?
Im so hot and I have 37219648 boyfriends lololol
Im just kinda here, I'm just... average... Just a little soul.. heh...
MOIST LIKE SHREK MMMM
I go to my room and blast my chemical romance while my parents yell at me to turn my music down. Honestly, I'd rather listen to the demons in my head than listen to them XD #rulesareforposers
Describe your friend group
Rawr XD We are the quirky emo kids
We are your average friend group. We're pretty normal, and pretty boring, and sometimes bullied... But we have each other so everything is TOTALLY FINE!
ShReK Is OuR SavIOr, we shall WORSHIP HIM FOREVER
Lolol lmao we the basic blondes lol we are sooooo pretty *moans*
What do you do after school?
I go into my underground layer so I can worship shrek with my fellow cult members
I eat baby hands, I- I mean I... uhhhh... Make art! Yeah!
I go on Snapchat and go to the mall with my besties lol lmao lolololol XD
I GO TO HOT TOPIC AND FUEL MY INNER DEMONS
What do others think of you?
THEY SOOOO WANNA DATE ME bc IM SO HOT AND BLONDE
Well... They think I'm kinda weird because I sit in the corner of the classroom while I blast pumped up kicks into my headphones x3
Others think I'm pretty tame and calm... but I guess on the inside I'm a raging ball of fire just waiting to BURST AND GET MY REVENGE!!! I mean... Others think I'm pretty normal bc I AM! Totally... heh...
They stare at me... But they don't understand... I just NEED TO LICK SHREK"S ONIONS!! GIMME HIS ONIONS NOW!!!!
What are you going to be when you grow up?
An Instagram model! Obviously!! I was born with these looks for a reason :/
I AM GOING TO BE IN A METAL BAND!!! FUELING MY INNER DEMONS THROUGH THESE MAJESTIC SCREAMS!!! XD RAWR
I.. I don't know... Maybe work at a gas station... I just need some money to pay off my college debts... I guess...
I SHALL BECOME SHREK AND INTERTWINE WITH HIS ONIONS!!! I WILL RULE OVER THE SWAMP!!
What is your favorite color combination?
Pink because it's so pretty like me!! And... Also white! Because I'm SUPER white lmao
Black because its the color of my soul and red because its the color of the blood of my enemies
Blue... I guess? It's the color of the ocean and the ocean is pretty cool I guess...
GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN
What's your outfit like?
Probably a crop top from forever 21, at LEAST 50 scrunchies, berkinstocks, booty shorts, TONS OF MAKEUP I LOVVEEEE MAKEUP!!!!! And of courseeeeee MY BOYFRIEND CUZ HES ON ME ALL THE TIME hehe..!!
Uhh well I usually get all of my clothes from hot topic hehe XD which usually consists of black ripped jeans, studded belt, band t-shirt, and OF COURSEEE a flannel uwu hehe x3
I just wear a simple outfit... Like a t-shirt and jeans... Nothing special bc I'm not special...
WHO THE HECK WEARS CLOTHES?!?! I WEAR ONIONS FOR SHREK SAKE!!! I LOVE WHEN THE ONION JUCIE SINKS INTO MY CREASES UWWWUUU HEHEHEHE
What is your favorite food?
I like to put my Starbucks Unicorn Frappe into my Hydroflask lmao I'm so basic lolol
LIVER
Idk... Maybe pizza? Mac & cheese?? Whatever is available I guess...
ONIONS DIPPED INTO SWAMP WATER MMMMMMM SO MOIST
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