which one of my trash oc's are you?

what's your favourite pass time?
setting fire to a local orphanage
stroking my cactus
suckling at the teet of communism
writing a home alone fanfic (smut)
sitting on a field of soft italian penises
building a mountainside cottage
what's kind of job do you have?
failed writer for the new york times
elderly
birthday clown
psychic healer
neighborhood pedophile advocate
goat semen taste tester
what is your childhood trauma?
watching your whole town be swallowed by an avalanche
your parents used your tweets in a custody battle
you kissed your dads dick
accidentally walked in on your grandparents having sex, now you have a kink for knee high surgical stockings
your cat was ran over, with a lawn mower
stole a penny from a classmate and received three days of being locked in an iron maiden
what type of house do you live in?
an abandoned mental asylum
penthouse apartment in the bronx
a hooverville
a hobbit hole
a greenhouse, no one knows you're there
a dumpster you've lovingly redesigned to look like a rabid rat's night club
what type of pet would you like?
a human being chained to a cement wall
a tapeworm
a thicc cow
a cracked out chihuahua with no teeth
a garter snake
a cat that's been possessed by the spirit of a victorian era murder victim
you've been dropped in the middle of a bad neighborhood. people surround you and threaten to suck your knees. what do you do?
say "i'm home" and treat everyone like a friend, even though they don't have a damn clue who you are
assert your dominance by pissing on every homeless man and trash can
have a panic attack and self destruct on the spot
begin speaking an ancient language before being shanked by a spork
swallow a cyanide pill and smile at the people while the life leaves your eyes
curl up in a ball and roll away into a gutter, but you drown in sewer shit
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