Gamer Type

The mayor of the town is overwhelmed with joy and relief that you saved his humble town by getting rid of those goblins that were stealing away all the women of the village and not to mention all their ale. He offers you the choice of one of two of the town’s sacred artifacts as a reward. Which do you choose?

The Amulet of Ascension. It adds 10% more experience points to all your future adventures. You’ll level up faster and save the world quicker.

The Staff of Satanic Supervision. You can control the actions of up to three other people, totally against their will.

Dirk the Dwarf is giving you a hard time in revealing the location of Princess Bubblebutt. How are you going to get him to give up the info you need?

Beat it out of him. Freaking dwarves and their beards and their mining.

Use your words. You can talk your way out of any situation. There’s no need for violence.

As you walk toward the next town, you come to a split in the road. You notice a group of other adventurers calling out to you to come join them in their quest further down on one side of the road. You also notice on the other side, there is a mysterious and unexplored gigantic grove. What do you do?

Join the group of adventurers. You’ll like the company and potential backup in sticky situations.

Head on down to the grove. Friends are overrated and the potential for new knowledge in the grove is calling out to you.

On your quest to retrieve the Unorthodox Ukulele of Usurping, you notice a history book lying beside the ukulele explaining its history. What do you do?

Read the book. The title of ukulele sounds kind of ominous. You should know more about it before you hand it off to some bard.

Grab the ukulele. You got stuff to do and experience points to gain. Ain’t nobody got time for reading.

A purple dragon is chasing you and a bunch of other players across the countryside. You all stole his gold and he isn’t happy. What do you do?

Head down into a clearing you explored a while ago. You found a hidey hole no one else knows about. You can hide out and snipe that jerk with arrows or spells from a safe distance.

Stop suddenly in the middle of a field as the dragon flies over you and turns to face you. You unleash your sword and shield ready to battle to the bloody end if necessary. Today is a good day to die. VALHALLA!!!

As you enter the capital, you see both a tavern and a merchant’s shop right next to each other. Which one tempts you more?

Go to the tavern. You’re itching to catch up on the latest gossip, listen to some singing, and fill your belly full of mead.

Go to the merchant’s. They may have enchanted armor or weapons. Don’t want to let other players get their greasy mitts on it first.

The guilds in the capital are recruiting. Which one piques your interest more?

The Mages’ Guild. Just thinking about all the scrolls, books, and lore in their library makes you as giddy as a young maid.

The Assassins’ Guild. Stabby, stab, stab, stab. Also, poison.

The Thieves’ Guild. Dat loot, tho.

The Bards’ Guild. Nothing but booze, music, and good times.

You’ve defeated your enemies, seen them driven before you, and have heard the lamentation of their women. How did you get to this point?

Through charisma. My wit and charm gets me out of the trickiest of situations.

My axe. It looks good in red...and hacking off my enemies limbs.

My mind. Knowledge is power and it taught me tricks of how to get to the end quick.

My perseverance. I did everything I could for everyone I met and didn’t take no for an answer.

Time to retire. What’s next for you?

Travel to another part of the world. There’s so much left to do and see.

Open a tavern. I want to hear stories from all over the world and meet new and interesting people. Also, booze!

Use that Unorthodox Ukulele of Usurpation and claim my place as ruler of this kingdom.

Buy a mansion in the capital and stock it with everything I got from my adventures. Also, swim in all my gold coins Ducktales style.

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