Guess Who

I do not have a pet rabbit, as I am allergic. Avoiding the furry beasts is usually not a problem although I might see them on occasion if I’m in a meadow picking flowers. That career test I took telling me to become a florist could have changed everything. Meadows are great. I can sing all the songs I learned in middle school choir until my heart’s content. Even the whistling parts. My missing tooth helps with the whistling parts.

I love seeing new places, but don’t put me on the mountain high. I’m terrified of heights. To cope, I would have to immediately shotgun a beer. No problem there – I can do it in under 4 seconds. I didn’t learn how to do that at the Indy 500. I’ve never actually been. You should take me the next time you go. I’ll make you biscuits and gravy if you do. I make the best.

If you need a dog, I have a few to spare. The count is currently 4! I’ll happily tell you all about them with the skills I gained from being on my college speech team. I can’t tell you about Prom, though. I never went. I’ve been to Vegas, however. Great city. I even played Blackjack next to an NBA player. Great experience. But my favorite experience is getting a call from my high school coach. He calls me 3-4 times a week from his assisted living center. Great guy. And a Hall of Famer at that!

If it’s a good tune you need, I’m your person. I play both piano and French horn beautifully. I’m not just a musical soul. I’ve played more competitive sports than foreign countries I’ve visited. Soccer, golf, and tennis are just a few on my list. Badminton is not my game. I broke my arm while playing as a kid. The three countries I’ve been to are Mexico, England, and Italy. It was in one of those I received my first kiss! The only language we spoke in common was the Language of Love.

I don’t like to stay in one place too long. I’ve moved almost as many times as years I’ve been alive. I was born with a lazy eye. Surgery fixed it so well, I now cannot cross my eyes. Good thing that wasn’t a requirement for my musical audition. Otherwise, I may not have landed the lead. I wonder if Epcot needs a Zulu speaker in their World Showcase. I can speak the language and have never been to Disney World.

If I meet you on vacation, I just may end up living with you for a bit. That’s how I met the family I lived with in Mexico. I wouldn’t be a bother. I can live on Chipotle burritos. I’ve even eaten two in one sitting. I would not eat your mint chocolate either. Blech. Just give me a burrito and a corner to read my favorite book, The Hobbit, and you won’t even know you picked up a random houseguest. I’ll be gone by football season for sure. I have plans to see my team play in all 32 stadiums.

I spent majority of my youth too shy to talk to people. And was an avid rule follower. I didn’t even get off the school bus my first time because the bus stop was across the street from my house. It was against the rules to cross the street. But I was too shy to ask what to do. So, I just stayed on the bus. I had my first surgery at 9 and was a page at the Indiana State House for Representative Katherine Willing at 12. That was the same year I took my first class at Purdue University.

My only disappointment from my carnie days was that they didn’t let me play the clarinet. Or use my stage director abilities honed in the 7th grade. Middle School was an all around stellar period in my life. I held a track and field record for a whole 10 minutes. But the pinnacle, the moment I hold onto during the most trying of times, was being awarded runner-up Ms. YMCA Daycamp.

I love all things Cleveland almost as much as my two children. I should also give a shout out to my three sisters who adequately prepped me to catch and keep my wife of twenty years. I am Team GMS through and through. Only two other companies ever had the pleasure of my presence, Circuit City and Sears. But it was GMS that captured my heart.

If I look tired, it’s because I had nightmares about forgetting things or regret that I never became the garbage person my childhood self aspired to be. I was distracted from my original career path by the beauty of the Grand Canyon. Awe-inspiring, but not as beautiful as my girlfriend who asked me to Prom. I was so thrilled I didn’t have to do the asking, I dunked a basketball.