Which Yacht Rock Character Are You?

What is your role aboard the yacht?
I practically live on the yacht. Anyone aboard is a friend of mine!
I board the yacht when it's convenient for me, but I like to model and lifeguard!
I follow and document the yacht from my music nook.
Brooding and occasionally emerging for a smooth jam on the bow.
I've only been on the boat like once, and honestly it wasn't that great.
Riding alongside it in a speedboat, mocking and tormenting those aboard.
Desperately chasing the yacht on jet skis, but making it look like I'm just out for some fun.
Hitting up everyone aboard for some smooth collaborations with my band.
I've never been on the yacht, but I watch it go by while I fish.
Threatening to set the yacht on fire.
I'm the captain, of course!
Like 12th wheeling everyone else, but it's ok. I'm just happy to be here.
I'm not on the yacht. I was dumped and left ashore before I ever got the chance.
Which fellow smooth musician would you love to work with most?
Kenny Loggins, even though he annoys me.
Michael McDonald, even though he won't put on his life jacket (the 80's)
I'd be too starstruck to work with any of them.
The Eagles... Immediately after we beat the shit out of them.
My band and I idolize Michael McDonald!
I don't want anything to do with those California vagina sailors.
I prefer to be inspired by my love life.
My best friend, Kenny Loggins.
Do I have to? Then Toto
Our idols, Steely Dan
I've never thought about that...
All of them are wonderful talents!
Michael McDonald adds what my songs need.
Mike McDonald! Squaddle deedle dee!
What is you favorite instrument?
My voice
Electric guitar
Anything that creates harmonically complex chord changes
Whatever turns up the power for hours and hours and hours
Acoustic guitar
Keyboards
Bass guitar
The smooth sound transcends mere instrumentation
How did you get started in yacht rock?
My smooth soul led the way
It was one of my many hobbies
As a music critic
You kidding? We started yacht rock
I did it on accident once
I can't go for that- No can do
Listening to Steely Dan inspired me
After being rejected by Michael McDonald
I came pretty close when I shot Kenny Loggins with a blowgun
I've had yacht elements inside me all along
By putting my scouting talents to smooth use
After singing my song to Koko
When my partner left me and I watched him sail away
Jimmy Buffett?
Mellow, but not smooth... Kinda shitty.
Cut everybody!
He has no place in my life.
Scat deetly bahp! Ah... fuck!
Boring.
I'd beat him up if he ever came near my turf.
He takes it easy.
Lame. Wouldn't know a groove if Jeff Porcaro hit him.
He's a threat to good music everywhere.
He freaks me out... But so does everything.
He makes me want to ride like the wind.
At least he HAS a successful career.
What do you think of doing Hollywood movie themes?
Fuck movie themes!
They rock! And so do I!
It creates an interesting power and loyalty dynamic amidst those on board the yacht.
Only if it's smooth.
I love rom-coms!
Whatever the kids are listening to!
That FM theme song should've been ours!!
I wish Out of Africa had come out earlier...
CHEZEBERGS TAST GUD
My life, my legacy is memorialized by the glamour of the film industry.
They show me who my most loyal shipmates are.
Whatever helps keep me relevant!
The thought of them makes me want to vomit, then cry.
If you were stranded on a desert island, what would you want with you most?
My lucky harpoon
A guitar
My best friend/collaborator
Rosanna
Sara
Something to keep the fire burnin'
Cocaine
Chezebergs
Eddie Van Halen
A radio or iPod
 
What is your favorite message from a yacht song?
For once in your life, here's your miracle: Stand up and fight! This is it!
They say it's a hopeless fight, but I say I gotta try
I never thought that losing you could ever hurt so bad
Children we have it right here; It's the light in my eyes, It's perfection and grace, It's the smile on my face
Don't you know that it's wrong to take what is given you
I believe love will always be the same The ways and means are the parts subject to change
Turn up the Eagles! The neighbors are listening
? None of them are about giving up your dreams to get wasted?
Tell 'em that it's human nature
Sailing takes me away to where I've always heard it could be
I've got such a long way to go to make it to the border of Mexico
The sentimental fool don't see trying hard to recreate What had yet to be created once in her life
The only way to start is heart to heart
What would you say to a friend who is considering abandoning ship for commercial 80s pop?
Get your dick out of your heart, prick!
Dear God, I hope it's smooth.
Doogiddy bah moogap Kenny!
Don't fight it!
He's reached the sixth stage of grief: rockin' out!
Turn up the power!
I can't hear you over all that DORK static!
Hold the line!
People love cheeseburgers but they can't get 'em.
Beat it!
The only thing that can penetrate our fortress of smoothitude is friendship.
Can I play my song now?
Fuck you, Loggins!
Who is your Yacht Rock crush?
Relevance throughout the 80's
Michael McDonald
Kenny Loggins
J.D. Ryznar
Peg
Gene Balboa
Sara
Rosanna
Does Stevie Nicks count?
Kevin Bacon
The children
The partnership of Loggins/McDonald.
Koko Goldstein
What is your favorite genre off the yacht?
Soul/R&B
Tie between Easy Wickening and Hard Organ
Jazz
Rock n' Roll
Country
Prog rock
Campfire songs
Hard rock
Yacht rock is the only true form of music.
Pop
Folk
What do you love most about yacht rock?
Smooth collaborations that show what it truly means to be human
The doors it opened to exploring other musical avenues
Hosting a show about it!
Dark, sarcastic lyrics, studio perfectionism, and having a bitter feud with the Eagles
Competing in songwriting competitions
Those nerds!
Creating smooth music that rocks!
Confusing its audiences and slipping them roofies
Forget smooth music! Hard rock's got me drilling more cooch than Black & Decker
The eternal salvation of Smooth Jesus
Reinventing my look as a desperate attempt at relevance
Watching my friends succeed and helping where I can
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