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Quizzes > Personality & Relationships

Am I Emotionally Unavailable Quiz: Honest Self-Check

Quick, free emotional availability test. Instant results.

Editorial: Review CompletedCreated By: Maha ClaveriaUpdated Aug 26, 2025
2-5mins
Profiles
Paper art illustration for emotionally unavailable quiz on a coral background

This quiz helps you check if you're emotionally unavailable and how it may show up in your relationships. If you're unsure whether distance is tied to immaturity, try the emotionally immature test. Wondering if boundaries have slipped into secrecy? See the emotional cheating quiz. And if patterns repeat, the relationship self-sabotage quiz can help you spot triggers.

When a partner asks how you feel mid-conversation, what do you most naturally do?
Offer a brief, guarded reply and steer back to safer ground
Break it down logically to make sense before sharing
Change the topic or take space until it cools off
Suggest talking later because you have tasks to finish first
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Your partner plans a spontaneous, intimate weekend. Your first inner reaction is:
Worried about losing control of my space and boundaries
I need details and structure before I can relax into it
It sounds nice, but I suddenly want distance
My calendar is packed; intimacy needs to be scheduled
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In conflict, which coping move shows up first for you?
Pull back and reinforce personal boundaries
Analyze the problem and propose a rational fix
Disappear for a bit to decompress
Tackle a to-do or errand to avoid the heaviness
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Text thread turns emotional. You tend to:
Reply with something brief and keep it surface-level
Write a measured, point-by-point response
Stop replying until it dies down
Say you're busy and will revisit later (then forget)
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A partner asks for more closeness than you expected this month. You:
Clarify boundaries and slow things way down
Negotiate terms so it makes logical sense to both of us
Feel flooded and instinctively create distance
Suggest calendar holds but keep postponing
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When someone shares vulnerable feelings with you, what do you prioritize?
Protecting myself from getting in too deep
Understanding the logic beneath their feelings
Easing the intensity by stepping back
Keeping the conversation short so I can get back to tasks
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At the start of a date, your comfort increases most when:
Boundaries are named and respected from the jump
There's a plan with clear expectations
We keep it light and unpressured with easy exits
The schedule is tight so it can't run long
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If a partner wants a deep talk at bedtime, you usually:
Say you're not ready to open up right now
Ask to table it and outline points for tomorrow
Slip into silence or suggest sleep instead
Remind them of tomorrow's early start and reschedule
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How do you tend to show care without heavy emotion?
Provide practical help while keeping feelings private
Offer insights, frameworks, or advice
Check in, then take space to avoid overwhelm
Run errands or handle logistics efficiently
undefined
When a relationship heats up quickly, your pacing preference is:
Slow and steady with firm guardrails
Calibrated by clear discussion and shared rules
Advance-then-retreat until it feels safer
Fit connection into existing routines first
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Cuddling during a movie feels best when:
I can initiate or pause contact on my terms
We check in about comfort and preferences
It's brief, light, and easy to step away from
It doesn't interfere with my planned tasks or sleep
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When someone probes your inner world unexpectedly, you
Tighten up and keep details to yourself
Translate sensations into tidy explanations
Ghost a bit or take a sudden breather
Suggest booking time later and move on
undefined
You're asked to share a recent hurt. You most likely:
Stay vague to avoid feeling exposed
Organize the story so it's coherent before speaking
Say "it's nothing" and pivot away
Check your calendar and suggest a later window
undefined
In a long-distance phase, the pattern you default to is:
Keep firm limits on how emotionally deep calls go
Set agendas for calls so they feel productive
Engage warmly, then skip a few check-ins
Delay calls because work and tasks expand to fill time
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When your partner is upset, your first impulse is to:
Stay composed and not get pulled in too far
Problem-solve and reframe to make it manageable
Give them space and check back later
Handle a quick chore to avoid the intensity
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A partner wants more frequent affection. You prefer to:
Set clear boundaries and keep affection contained
Discuss frequency and context to align expectations
Offer sporadic bursts, then pull back
Schedule brief moments rather than lingering ones
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I feel safest when people earn access to my deeper feelings over time
True
False
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Logic is my primary tool for navigating emotional conversations
True
False
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Ignoring messages always deepens trust
True
False
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I stack my schedule to avoid sitting with hard feelings
True
False
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Emotional intensity means I must immediately withdraw every time
True
False
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Boundaries help me love without losing myself
True
False
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Feelings are only valid when they are rationally explained
True
False
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If I stay busy enough, intimacy takes care of itself
True
False
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Space during conflict helps me return more consistently
True
False
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Staying emotionally guarded is the only path to safety
True
False
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When a plan changes last-minute, you feel most:
Protective of my time and energy; I pull back
Eager to re-plan so it makes logical sense
Relieved to have space; might go quiet
Tempted to fill the gap with errands/tasks
undefined
Your ideal way to share a tough day is:
Light on details; I'll open up when it feels safer
A clear summary with steps I'll take next
A quick check-in, then some alone time
A brief slot in the calendar so it doesn't spill over
undefined
In-person silence with a partner feels:
Safer when I choose it; risky if they push for more
Comfortable if we've aligned on its meaning
Better than intense talk; I may still drift away
Fine as long as I can multitask quietly
undefined
When planning a future together, your mind jumps to:
How to avoid losing independence
Roadmaps, pros/cons, and timelines
Whether it's getting too intense for comfort
Scheduling and workload impacts first
undefined
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Profiles

  1. The Emotional Fortress -

    You score highest on emotional detachment, often shielding your feelings and keeping relationships at arm's length. To challenge this outcome, start small by sharing one personal thought per day and revisit your responses in this emotional unavailability test.

  2. The Guarded Gatekeeper -

    You're selective about whom you let in, maintaining control but sometimes missing deeper connection opportunities. Try opening up during low-stakes moments and track your progress with our am i emotionally unavailable quiz.

  3. The Selective Sharer -

    You balance privacy and intimacy by choosing when and with whom to reveal emotions, yet occasional detachment may still surface. Strengthen bonds by scheduling brief check-ins with close friends and reflecting on insights from this emotional detachment test.

  4. The Empathetic Explorer -

    You generally stay in tune with your feelings and those of others, but you might hold back under stress. Practice mindful vulnerability - express one honest feeling daily - and see how it shifts your score on this emotional unavailability test.

  5. The Open Bridge -

    You thrive on emotional connection, readily sharing and supporting others without fear of vulnerability. Keep up your strengths by setting healthy boundaries and revisit this emotionally unavailable test whenever you face new challenges.

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