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Quizzes > Personality & Relationships

Is My Partner Controlling Quiz: Spot the Signs

Quick, free controlling relationship quiz with instant, private results.

Editorial: Review CompletedCreated By: Anda SaracutUpdated Aug 27, 2025
2-5mins
Profiles
Paper art illustration for a quiz on identifying controlling behavior in a partner on a dark blue background.

This quiz helps you tell if your partner's behavior is controlling and what it could mean for your relationship. Answer quick questions and get instant guidance you can use to set boundaries and communicate clearly. If you're noticing manipulation or put-downs, you might also explore our partner narcissist quiz or check the is my relationship toxic quiz. For a self-check, try the am i controlling quiz.

When you share a new boundary, what usually happens next?
It is heard and we adapt together
It is met with mild resistance but eventually accepted
I worry about the reaction and soften or retract it
I am told no or face consequences if I push it
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Your plans for the weekend suddenly change; how are decisions made?
We discuss options and pick what suits us both
I defer to keep the peace most times
I quickly switch plans to avoid conflict
My partner decides and I am expected to comply
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How do you feel about voicing an unpopular opinion with your partner?
Comfortable; it leads to useful dialogue
A bit hesitant; I gauge their mood first
Anxious; I rehearse or avoid saying it
Unsafe; disagreement brings punishment or blame
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When you ask for personal time or space, what is the typical response?
Respect and curiosity about my needs
A sigh or small guilt trip, then reluctant agreement
Tension rises; I often cancel my alone time
Flat refusal or accusations of disloyalty
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After a disagreement, how are repairs made?
We both reflect, apologize, and adjust behavior
I often smooth things over first to move on
I apologize quickly to stop fallout, even if unsure why
I am blamed and expected to fix it alone
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Your social circle involvement over the past year looks like this:
Steady or growing, with mutual encouragement
Slightly reduced to avoid friction
Noticeably trimmed to prevent arguments
Sharply limited or monitored by my partner
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Money choices like purchases or budgeting are handled how?
Transparent conversations and shared decisions
I run extras by them to avoid lectures
I hide or delay spending to dodge conflict
I lack access or need permission for basics
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When you receive good news, how safe does it feel to share it?
Very safe; excitement is celebrated
Usually fine, but I watch timing and tone
Risky; I edit details to avoid triggering them
Unsafe; it could be dismissed or used against me
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How are digital boundaries (phones, passwords, messages) handled?
Mutual privacy is respected without pressure
I sometimes share to avoid suspicion
I routinely hide or delete to stay out of trouble
I am required to share or be monitored
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In moments of stress, how does your partner communicate?
Directly and respectfully, even when upset
Terse or moody, but open to calming down
Sharp or unpredictable; I tread lightly
Threatening, demeaning, or punitive
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Your sense of self around your partner feels like:
Aligned; I can be fully myself
Slightly compressed to avoid small conflicts
Fragmented; I monitor words and actions constantly
Erased; choices are imposed or coerced
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If you say no to intimacy, what typically follows?
Respect and care without pressure
A sulk or guilt-laced comments, then it passes
Persistent coaxing until I give in or deflect
Anger, ultimatums, or retaliation
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Travel or time away for work or hobbies is treated how?
Supported and coordinated with trust
Tolerated with a few conditions
Questioned heavily; I trim trips to avoid issues
Restricted, forbidden, or surveilled
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How are your friendships portrayed by your partner?
Valued; they ask about and welcome my friends
Treated as distractions when inconvenient
Often criticized; I limit updates about them
Labeled as threats; I am pressured to cut ties
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When a miscommunication happens, what is the pattern?
We clarify assumptions and reset together
I take the lead smoothing it over to keep calm
I go quiet to avoid making it worse
I am accused or punished regardless of context
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Household roles and chores are set by:
Transparent agreements and flexibility
Subtle pressure shaping who does what
Me taking on extra to avoid conflict
Rigid rules enforced by my partner
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When you need support (doctor visit, family issue), what happens?
They show up with empathy and coordination
Support is offered with strings attached
I downplay needs to avoid being a burden
Needs are dismissed or used for control
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How do you handle mistakes you make in the relationship?
Own it, repair, and feel safe learning
Apologize and hope it is not revisited repeatedly
Over-apologize and brace for fallout
Confess to avoid greater penalties or control
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If you succeed (raise, award, milestone), your partner tends to:
Celebrate and ask how to support next steps
Offer lukewarm praise but steer plans their way
Show irritation; I minimize my wins
Undermine, forbid, or punish the success
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When schedules conflict, the default expectation is:
We problem-solve and share the load
I adjust more often to keep things smooth
I cancel my plans to avert conflict
Their plans override mine without discussion
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Jealousy proves love
True
False
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You owe your partner your real-time location at all times
True
False
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Mutual consent is essential for healthy intimacy
True
False
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Checking a partner's phone without permission is healthy
True
False
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Boundaries are a sign of disrespect
True
False
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Partners can disagree respectfully without fear
True
False
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Isolation from friends and resources is a red flag
True
False
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Good partners make decisions for you to keep you safe
True
False
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You have the right to say no without punishment
True
False
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Apologies followed by changed behavior show accountability
True
False
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Profiles

  1. Respectful Ally -

    Your partner respects your autonomy and you rarely worry about being controlled, a sign you passed the is my partner controlling quiz with flying colors. You've built a foundation of trust and healthy give-and-take. Tip: keep nurturing open dialogue to sustain this balanced bond.

  2. Gentle Influencer -

    You notice occasional teasing about your choices or mild jealousy, hinting at the subtle red flags spotted in this controlling relationship quiz. While these signs aren't alarming, they're worth addressing. Tip: set clear boundaries and share your feelings before small habits grow.

  3. Boundary Tester -

    Your partner sometimes criticizes or pressures you, leaving you to wonder, "Is my boyfriend controlling?" These patterns indicate emerging control tactics. Tip: assert your needs firmly and revisit the controlling partner quiz to track progress together.

  4. Micromanagement Mode -

    If you often feel monitored or second-guessed, the controlling partner quiz reveals significant boundary violations and power play tactics. This level of oversight can undermine your confidence. Tip: reach out to trusted friends or a counselor for support and establish firm limits.

  5. Power Play Prisoner -

    You experience isolation, intimidation or strict rules - key red flags in our controlling relationship quiz. This outcome signals serious control that can harm your well-being. Tip: prioritize your safety, create an exit plan and consider professional help or a support network.

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